They say when it rains, it pours. That expression didn’t pop up in my head on its own – I was venting to my gal pal and Zumba buddy Ashley (check her out by the way, she’s awesome) about all the happenings of the past week and she replied with that expression. She may have used an expletive as well.
And honestly, it was f*cking perfect. See what I did there?
If 2020 wasn’t enough of a crap fest already in the first quarter with an NBA legend passing and Australian wildfires, of course a worldwide pandemic would be the perfect cherry on top. The pandemic was/is creating problems on a large scale, no doubt; but within our homes it is creating its own set of different challenges that all of us unfortunately have to deal with. Whether it is suddenly finding ourselves unemployed, isolated and alone, trapped in a house with a bad case of cabin fever, getting on each others’ nerves for those of us who live with other folks or worse – seriously ill as a result of the virus itself… to say that times are rough is an understatement for many.
I’m fortunate enough to say that my problems I suppose seem trivial next to the struggles of others. However, this week I was presented with two news items, neither of which were pleasant.
My mom’s aunt was terminally ill in the Philippines, and while I had known that for several days, I wasn’t expecting her to pass so quickly. The day she had passed, my sister attempted to call my mom to get updates. My mom, who isn’t the best at picking up the phone to begin with didn’t pick up. I told my sister that it was highly likely my mom was already on the phone speaking with her siblings and other relatives about the passing.
To my shock and horror, it turns out my mom had slipped in the bathroom and was in excruciating pain.
Just to give some context, my parents moved to Roseville over a year ago (something that I still haven’t come to grips with fully) and their plan was to have my dad work in the Bay Area for a few more years and settle in Roseville once he is retired. In the meantime, he’d drive up on the weekends to be with my mom. My first reaction when they decided to move was entirely selfish on my end. I didn’t want them to move because I wanted them here. Because I needed them here. Despite the fact that I I’d visit once or twice a week at best – just the idea of knowing that I could visit at a moment’s notice and eat lunch with my mom and dad was a comforting one. My second reaction was fear. What if she were alone during the weekdays and something horrible happened? I always worry about my parents’ health – my mom more so.
… So she broke her hip and was in pain. One good thing about this pandemic (there’s something that I’m sure you don’t hear too much of) is my dad was off work and at home with her. She was rushed to the hospital by ambulance and admitted immediately. My dad was unable to go with her due to the COVID-19 restrictions. It was extremely scary being here in Campbell and unable to do anything. She had to undergo hip surgery and they inserted a metal disk.
And she had to go through it alone.
My dad was awesome and sent us updates periodically throughout the night as he’d get them. My siblings also were proactive with trying to figure out solutions for her recovery. I facetimed her a few times – she’s still in the hospital and is in pain but at least she is alive and will be on the road to recovery soon. Thank god!
If that wasn’t enough, my brother dropped this bombshell that his wife (my sister in-law) found a cancerous tumor in her colon. She will be admitted for surgery to extract it today. I am praying that once it is removed that it will be the end of it. She is the mother of one of my two nephews born a week apart – the other nephew being from my sister, Athena. We need her alive and well to guide him. She too, will be alone in the hospital due to COVID-19.
So where am I going with this? I wish I knew. This is what is in my head at the moment.
My take away is that I love my family. I’ve always known that. Likewise, I know it’s the same for many of you. Sometimes it’s easy to forget in our day to day lives that nothing is permanent. Things can change in the blink of an eye. A home can be sold, a job lost – even worse, a loved one can pass (rest in peace, Auntie Flor).
During this pandemic lock down, I hope those of you who are fortunate enough to have a loved one living with you spend time loving them harder (interpret that however way you want… I can already imagine the giggles from some of you).
This also isn’t exclusive to a significant other. If you have kids, enjoy the moment. They may drive you crazy when you’re trying to work remote or when you’re trying to decompress, but you are their everything. If you live alone, I hope you find the time to face time or have great phone calls with loved ones.
Last night, Jey was sleeping freakishly close to me. Normally, we sleep pretty far apart – we both need that space and overheat quickly. But last night I think he subconsciously just needed me to be close, or perhaps he sensed I needed it. Either way, I’m glad he was there.
Much love to you all! Stay healthy, and take care of yourselves.
xo